Cyclist
Opinion: Men’s cycling has never been more bleak for fans
The 2024 season has thus far had all the excitement of a funeral procession. Inevitable winners, interminable broadcasts and attritional storylines have made this the toughest season in recent memory to justify your pro cycling fan status. Bluntly, we are in the cycling fan ice age.
In the doldrums, men’s cycling is crying out for some serious competition, action and suspense. We are already four months into the programme for this year and the light at the end of the tunnel is looking dim. With Tadej Pogačar destined for Giro glory and Tour de France competitors in hospital beds, there’s little reason to hang up the yellow bunting this summer.
While women’s cycling has served up a veritable buffet of surprises, the men’s calendar is looking a whole lot less fruitful. Whether it’s one-day races, stage races or Grand Tours, we are stuck with a measly offering of domination, sterilisation and exhaustion from the new post-pandemic cycling paradigm.
Classics sans vintage
The charming cinematics of the Classics were completely lost this year. In lieu, we bore witness to a dirge of one-man shows.
Apart from the last one percent of Milan-San Remo, the Monuments this year have been a snoozefest. Watching Paris-Roubaix felt like a chore and the Tour of Flanders lost its spark. I learnt my lesson by the time we reached the Ardennes. Once Pogačar was away on La Redoute, I switched off and got back to cleaning my apartment and doing the laundry.
When either Pogačar or Mathieu van der Poel took to the startline, the end result looked inevitable. These guys are in their mid-to-late twenties now, so there’s every likelihood their domination could continue for seasons to come. Maybe Wout van Aert could have saved the day, but as José Mourinho once said, ‘If I speak, I am in big trouble.’
The Giro d’Inevitability
The Giro d’Italia is normally the iced tea of the cycling calendar. We get eased into Grand Tour sweetness with an intriguing battle between those who are too cool to go to the Tour.
In a start list notably lacking in big names this year, Italy’s Grand Tour seems to have the cycling community puffing out a collective sigh in 2024. A race that’s usually a refreshing contrast to the Tour de France looks instead like it will be a test of patience and resilience for the viewer. Be prepared for Pogačar to dart away in the Dolomites and sew up the maglia rosa as early as possible in order to ease his Tour de France preparations.
Even in the days of Chris Froome and the Texan we don’t talk about anymore, the Giro d’Italia offered a chance for some real Grand Tour action free of the sterilised affairs in a Tour de France sanitised by dominant figures and superteams alike.
In 2024, we don’t even have the prospect of an open battle for pink. Instead, the most exciting part of the Giro is likely to be predicting the second-place finisher behind Pogačar. And whoever it is will inevitably be forgotten about in the future matrix of cycling feats.
The prospect of spending three weeks ‘witnessing greatness’ doesn’t do much to motivate the viewer to tune into the Corsa Rosa. Why tune in when you know the winner? Is there really any point?
What about the Tour de France?
While the Giro is set to be a walkover for Pogačar, and a pity party for all behind, the Tour de France doesn’t look much rosier either.
Remco Evenepoel, Primož Roglič and Jonas Vingegaard are all recovering from injury following the barbaric fourth stage of the Tour of the Basque Country. The chances of seeing Vingegaard even race at all this year now look fleeting given the severity of the crashes he suffered on the Basque roads.
With Pogačar’s odds narrowing by the minute, the Tour de France looks set to return to Pogačar world order. Evenepoel is already considering his 2025 plans, while Roglič is fading into the back of our minds following a disappointing start to his tenure at Bora-Hansgrohe.
The promised ‘Tour to end all Tours’ looks like it has been spoiled by cycling’s cruel wheel of fortune. A stunted battle looks imminent, with only the Olympic Games motivating us through this three-week whitewash around France.
No more saving graces
Normally, we can at least rely on the one-week stage races to dish up a healthy serving of unpredictability. In 2024 form, however, our plate is looking nutrient deficient.
If you’re struggling to guess who will win the major UCI WorldTour stage races, just choose one of the big riders – namely Pogačar, Vingegaard, Evenepoel or Roglič. If it’s not one of them bringing home the bacon, be sure to namedrop of their luxury domestique-turned-leader types (we’re looking at you, Matteo Jorgenson and Juan Ayuso).
We now live in an era where winning week-long stage races by over a minute has become normalised. This was not the case ten years ago, heck, even five years ago. The old anarchical world of the week-long stage race is lost in the postmodern cycling landscape we find ourselves in.
Perhaps we can rely on the Vuelta. The Spanish three-week-long crusade usually fosters a wild-west battle for supremacy. However, in the past three years, this sparkle has been lost. Quite frankly, it’s the Grand Tour racer’s afterthought. Maybe the Vuelta will become a rehab race for the walking wounded once again, but the script seems up in the air and unappetising.
Fleeting gold medal hopes
It’s not all doom and gloom. The Olympic Games are returning this summer. A city-centre circuit around Paris will have an unfamiliar look compared to what we’re used to seeing on the final day of the Tour. Say farewell to the Champs-Elysées and hello to the cobble climb of Montmartre.
Cobble climb, you say? Expect to see Van der Poel targeting this with laser-like precision. And he rarely misses when he’s locked on target. Alongside a devilish Dutch team, it’s hard to imagine any scenario where someone else wins.
The World Championships in Zürich will try to brand itself as one last hurrah for the 2024 season before we finally put it to bed. However, the Worlds are looking like they could be another scene of a Pogačar crime against our collective humanity. Expect a similar narrative to Liège–Bastogne–Liège. Some commentators have already claimed Pogi the gold medallist elect, five months before the racing starts in Switzerland.
Get out the violins
We are on a sinking cycling Titanic. The band is playing as we get sucked into the icy North Atlantic of the 2024 UCI WorldTour calendar.
There are few life jackets to save us here, we just have to accept the 2024 season for what it is. Maybe we’ll look back on it and admire all these stout-hearted race wins. That’ll take some time, that’s for sure.
For now, let’s pile into the lifeboats and prepare for the worst. Thank god for women’s cycling.
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